Introduction

I guess I'll start with the recent events that inspired me to create this blog. My anxiety was recently so bad that I had physical symptoms so powerful; I was compelled to call 9-1-1 at work thinking that I was in fact, going to die. This is hilarious to me now, but at the moment I truly thought my existence was ending and even worse my impact for good on this earth was meager at best. Now I don't think by creating a blog and maybe putting a few smiles on a few faces, does that improve my impact.. but it will at least start a chain of events in myself that keep the positive energy moving to inspire bigger and better things.

You'll have to forgive my poor grammar, which funnily enough has sometimes been a source of anxiety for me. I swear the two weeks where they taught grammar in third grade coincided with my "see how well I fake sick" phase. And the "see how well I fake sick" phase may have coincided with my being turned down flat by my third grade crush. Ah, anxiety, you've had a hold on me for a very long time.

I  am the middle child of an older brother and a younger sister, both who live with anxiety as well. Growing up we had an extremely anxious mother. Using anxious to describe her is a very mild way of putting it. I love my mother very much, but she didn't let us go out with friends when the moon was full. Now either she was hiding a family secret that we were werewolves, or she was overwhelmed and controlled by her fear of the "what could happen" 's. My mother grew up with little to no supervision with her six siblings in the early 70's. A time where my grandmothers hair appointments were more important than feeding her seven children, a time where my mother had no guidance and became a bully and a bad girl, a time that was so utterly different than the one she raised me in.

Being a mother of two small boys myself, I respect my mother so much more each time I worry about them. But I also worry that my anxiety will pass on to them like my mothers did to me. Everyday I try to be rational and logical and think of all the ways my life is safe and blessed instead of all the horrible things that could happen. This blog is to remind me that anxiety is simply my over active thought process that occasionally controls my body, turning me in to a hypochondriac freak. This blog is to help other people suffering from anxiety to see that through the irrationality of it all, you can be normal and happy too.